GUEST POST by Prateek Singh
Isn't it weird. How a person can be normal, be sane and be happy and try as fucking hard to belong and succeed. And fit in but with all those smiles and dances and dabs wants to fucking shout out loud, wants to fucking explode with everything inside him. Just blow up and cry for hours hoping that something fucking lifts this weight off his chest.
What the fuck is depression? Can it be medically diagnosed ?
Maybe.
Can you see it.
Yes.
Can you feel it.
Fuck yes.
But then why does it feel superficial why does it feel undeserved. And why does it keep coming back. Shouldn't we find depressed people funny? That they fall asleep everyday listening to the same three songs. Crying to the same three songs. Looking at the same 6 pictures. Telling themselves that they're precious. That they don't deserve things that have happened to them but that's okay it's life. It's what it is. And then maybe just maybe if they lie down at 10:23, they can fall asleep by 3:23. Twisting and turning in their own sorrow. Their own fucking broken being. And If they're really lucky. They'll sleep till 6 in the morning. And not be awoken by the same god damn nightmares every freaking 15 minutes.
Is this depression?
Maybe.
Is this worth being worried about?
Maybe.
So then why does it feel like it's superficial?
I don't know.
But don't other people have it worse?
Yes they do.
So I am just being a little bitch ?
Yes, I guess. Maybe.
I don't know .
Then who does?
I don't know.
Ever since Abigail left, no matter how much I want to be the person I want to be i can't. she was the only one I could be anything with. And that's what I miss. That person. That feeling. That belief.
Isn't it weird. How a person can be normal, be sane and be happy and try as fucking hard to belong and succeed. And fit in but with all those smiles and dances and dabs wants to fucking shout out loud, wants to fucking explode with everything inside him. Just blow up and cry for hours hoping that something fucking lifts this weight off his chest.
What the fuck is depression? Can it be medically diagnosed ?
Maybe.
Can you see it.
Yes.
Can you feel it.
Fuck yes.
But then why does it feel superficial why does it feel undeserved. And why does it keep coming back. Shouldn't we find depressed people funny? That they fall asleep everyday listening to the same three songs. Crying to the same three songs. Looking at the same 6 pictures. Telling themselves that they're precious. That they don't deserve things that have happened to them but that's okay it's life. It's what it is. And then maybe just maybe if they lie down at 10:23, they can fall asleep by 3:23. Twisting and turning in their own sorrow. Their own fucking broken being. And If they're really lucky. They'll sleep till 6 in the morning. And not be awoken by the same god damn nightmares every freaking 15 minutes.
Is this depression?
Maybe.
Is this worth being worried about?
Maybe.
So then why does it feel like it's superficial?
I don't know.
But don't other people have it worse?
Yes they do.
So I am just being a little bitch ?
Yes, I guess. Maybe.
I don't know .
Then who does?
I don't know.
Ever since Abigail left, no matter how much I want to be the person I want to be i can't. she was the only one I could be anything with. And that's what I miss. That person. That feeling. That belief.
